Comments on: Hitting Rock Bottom http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/ Open Source Personal Development Thu, 17 May 2012 09:55:13 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: Joshua http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/comment-page-2/#comment-38402 Joshua Wed, 25 Apr 2012 05:50:30 +0000 http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/#comment-38402 Yo im josh i think rock bottom is all sorts of issues that begin, im twenty nine going on thirty years old i still live with my mom, all my life ive been teased never paid attention to school work but focuse on how to fit in..Now shortly after high school i became a drug user and alcolholic, ive never been that stud that all the women wanted to be with and all thee above so far affected me allot, what im getting at is i was fierd from four years of hard work about eight months ago, im collecting unemployment doing what i love and thats music im having a hard time finding fans im mostly using facebook to meet my fans but it seems like everyones not liking me for who i am, maybe they think im too BOLD or a bad person cause i brag about all the weed i smoke or liking all these women at the same time, even ive stoped talking to family over jeoulosy now besides all the bumb's i think i been rock bottom pretty much my hole life got to go bye... Please anyone answer what you think:) Yo im josh i think rock bottom is all sorts of issues that begin, im twenty nine going on thirty years old i still live with my mom, all my life ive been teased never paid attention to school work but focuse on how to fit in..Now shortly after high school i became a drug user and alcolholic, ive never been that stud that all the women wanted to be with and all thee above so far affected me allot, what im getting at is i was fierd from four years of hard work about eight months ago, im collecting unemployment doing what i love and thats music im having a hard time finding fans im mostly using facebook to meet my fans but it seems like everyones not liking me for who i am, maybe they think im too BOLD or a bad person cause i brag about all the weed i smoke or liking all these women at the same time, even ive stoped talking to family over jeoulosy now besides all the bumb’s i think i been rock bottom pretty much my hole life got to go bye… Please anyone answer what you think:)

]]> By: L http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/comment-page-1/#comment-38091 L Thu, 12 Apr 2012 15:39:30 +0000 http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/#comment-38091 Hi. I just wanted to say I feel for you Kev, but I wanted to point something out. You say that when you quit drinking you are stressed and moody and take it out on everyone. Do you realize that when you’re drinking you aren’t being particularly good either so you may as well go for the healthy one. I am a now grown daughter of an alcoholic and I can tell you that I would have preferred the moody version to the drunk version!! The sober, but moody version is at least someone you can count on. My father never did quit drinking and is currently living in a run down shack of a house with no running water and I haven’t seen him in 15 years. He has his alcohol and seems not to need anyone or anything else, but I hear he spends a lot of time crying over the past. It’s a pretty sad existence. He has missed everything! He lost everything. He is alone. It’s not too late for you to turn your life around. Life will go on without you and so will your children. I'm rooting for you!! Hi. I just wanted to say I feel for you Kev, but I wanted to point something out. You say that when you quit drinking you are stressed and moody and take it out on everyone. Do you realize that when you’re drinking you aren’t being particularly good either so you may as well go for the healthy one. I am a now grown daughter of an alcoholic and I can tell you that I would have preferred the moody version to the drunk version!! The sober, but moody version is at least someone you can count on.

My father never did quit drinking and is currently living in a run down shack of a house with no running water and I haven’t seen him in 15 years. He has his alcohol and seems not to need anyone or anything else, but I hear he spends a lot of time crying over the past. It’s a pretty sad existence. He has missed everything! He lost everything. He is alone. It’s not too late for you to turn your life around. Life will go on without you and so will your children.

I’m rooting for you!!

]]> By: Gary http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/comment-page-1/#comment-33913 Gary Fri, 09 Sep 2011 19:55:03 +0000 http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/#comment-33913 Hi, I'm Gary I've read all your comments and it does help but i've still got a drink in my hand. I'm 50, have always loved a drink since being a real ale person of the 70's. unfortunately i use it to escape my shy nature and hate for myself.I only drink occasionally and September is always my big downfall as I become so anxious about teaching again although I enjoy it and feel fine once i'm in the swing.. I'm 6 ft 1in but very slender and it has always been a big hang up of mine ,I'm only 11 and a bit stone and have always had comments about being thin. i feel a failure in so many ways - have been an organist at a big church in Notting Hill for 28 years but feel so inadequate. I will fight it again . hope to hear other ways of getting through this. Problem is I like a pint, its like a ritual but only every so often and then it messes up my family life until I sort it. it's a long term pattern that I want to ditch.G Hi, I’m Gary I’ve read all your comments and it does help but i’ve still got a drink in my hand. I’m 50, have always loved a drink since being a real ale person of the 70’s. unfortunately i use it to escape my shy nature and hate for myself.I only drink occasionally and September is always my big downfall as I become so anxious about teaching again although I enjoy it and feel fine once i’m in the swing.. I’m 6 ft 1in but very slender and it has always been a big hang up of mine ,I’m only 11 and a bit stone and have always had comments about being thin. i feel a failure in so many ways – have been an organist at a big church in Notting Hill for 28 years but feel so inadequate. I will fight it again . hope to hear other ways of getting through this. Problem is I like a pint, its like a ritual but only every so often and then it messes up my family life until I sort it. it’s a long term pattern that I want to ditch.G

]]> By: Ashley http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/comment-page-1/#comment-30966 Ashley Fri, 08 Apr 2011 03:54:57 +0000 http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/#comment-30966 I struggled with an addiction for 10 years, I have a daughter who is almost 3. I hit rock bottom last october. My husband and I turned to a 12 step out-patient program for help. Unfortunately we were burried so deep it did not change us, all hope was lost and separating was totally out of the question. On my 25th birthday my husband was arrested and was sitting in jail for stealing. Of course I continued my addictive behavior. My husband never made it out of jail in time to be with us, at the same damn time he was then serving jail time for a prior felony 4 and parole violation and which he is currently serving 11 months in prison. As a wife and mother I found myself alone with a child to raise. Leaving my husband altogether would of been the best thing for me to beat addiction, I've filed for a dissolusion afterall, I was stupid and easily manipulated, I see that now that im not under the influence of a drug. Sadly we were taking turns driving the "crazy train", feeding off of eachothers weakness. Today I am seven months sober, living my life to the fullest with my little side-kick kal, my best friend, my daughter, my girl, my life. Im currently getting it together one step at a time with the help from my 27 year old sister. First step addmiting to yourself that your living your life assed-backwards, and you hurt the people that "LOVED" who you really were before your addiction. As soon as you drop the drink or drug baby its all uphill from there. Everything you ever known as being "COOL" is "WEAK" Focusing on daily rutine is very important in recovery. Every day you should strive for something that makes you happy, if you have children read to them, play, teach them something your good at. Try to read a book, Go to the library surf the web its free,...who knows you might meet someone worth conversating with. Cook a healthy meal, learn about healthy relationships, take short walks, its limitless. Knowledge yourself, know who you are and who you want to be, and you will be exactly that. I struggled with an addiction for 10 years, I have a daughter who is almost 3. I hit rock bottom last october. My husband and I turned to a 12 step out-patient program for help. Unfortunately we were burried so deep it did not change us, all hope was lost and separating was totally out of the question. On my 25th birthday my husband was arrested and was sitting in jail for stealing. Of course I continued my addictive behavior. My husband never made it out of jail in time to be with us, at the same damn time he was then serving jail time for a prior felony 4 and parole violation and which he is currently serving 11 months in prison. As a wife and mother I found myself alone with a child to raise. Leaving my husband altogether would of been the best thing for me to beat addiction, I’ve filed for a dissolusion afterall, I was stupid and easily manipulated, I see that now that im not under the influence of a drug. Sadly we were taking turns driving the “crazy train”, feeding off of eachothers weakness. Today I am seven months sober, living my life to the fullest with my little side-kick kal, my best friend, my daughter, my girl, my life. Im currently getting it together one step at a time with the help from my 27 year old sister. First step addmiting to yourself that your living your life assed-backwards, and you hurt the people that “LOVED” who you really were before your addiction. As soon as you drop the drink or drug baby its all uphill from there. Everything you ever known as being “COOL” is “WEAK” Focusing on daily rutine is very important in recovery. Every day you should strive for something that makes you happy, if you have children read to them, play, teach them something your good at. Try to read a book, Go to the library surf the web its free,…who knows you might meet someone worth conversating with. Cook a healthy meal, learn about healthy relationships, take short walks, its limitless. Knowledge yourself, know who you are and who you want to be, and you will be exactly that.

]]> By: sydnei http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/comment-page-1/#comment-17046 sydnei Wed, 13 Jan 2010 02:25:50 +0000 http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/#comment-17046 my bf is an alocholic. he admits it, has been to aa, but it is a cycle he drinks sun, mon, tue, wed, thurs on fri he wont drink since we see each other fri and sat. i don't hear from him usually all week until say thurs or fri morning. he vows every weekend he is going to try again and go to aa and take kudzu (an herb that stops the craving - which HAS worked for him). he has even read nasty, out of character, text messages he sends me at night when he is drunk and is ashamed of them when he sees them in the morning. like what i've read here and on different sites..he is two different people...sober...i couldn't special order a more perfect guy....drunk he's the devil. is he blowing smoke up my ass when he tells me he wants to quit and he hates this? from where i'm sitting he isn't even trying. i don't want to give up on him - but this is getting old - alcohol took his life i don't want it to take mine too. i guess i just want to know from someone who has been in his shoes....does he sound remotely close to finding sobriety? since apr/may 2009 he has been in and out of aa...sober no more than 10 days. my bf is an alocholic. he admits it, has been to aa, but it is a cycle he drinks sun, mon, tue, wed, thurs on fri he wont drink since we see each other fri and sat. i don’t hear from him usually all week until say thurs or fri morning. he vows every weekend he is going to try again and go to aa and take kudzu (an herb that stops the craving – which HAS worked for him). he has even read nasty, out of character, text messages he sends me at night when he is drunk and is ashamed of them when he sees them in the morning. like what i’ve read here and on different sites..he is two different people…sober…i couldn’t special order a more perfect guy….drunk he’s the devil. is he blowing smoke up my ass when he tells me he wants to quit and he hates this? from where i’m sitting he isn’t even trying. i don’t want to give up on him – but this is getting old – alcohol took his life i don’t want it to take mine too. i guess i just want to know from someone who has been in his shoes….does he sound remotely close to finding sobriety? since apr/may 2009 he has been in and out of aa…sober no more than 10 days.

]]> By: Rochelle Toon http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/comment-page-1/#comment-15613 Rochelle Toon Sat, 14 Nov 2009 23:43:37 +0000 http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/#comment-15613 As someone on the other end of alcoholism. I want to let you know that your daughters will greatly appreciate everything you are doing for yourself to get better. Your wife/girlfriend will also respect and love you more deeply with every effort that you take. Family is the one thing is life that is constant and good. If you let it be. I have been on the daughter side of an alcoholic, and I am now on the girlfriend side of an alcoholic. I prey ever day that He will see the destruction he has not only caused himself but every one that actually cares for him, that will be here for him in the end! As someone on the other end of alcoholism. I want to let you know that your daughters will greatly appreciate everything you are doing for yourself to get better. Your wife/girlfriend will also respect and love you more deeply with every effort that you take. Family is the one thing is life that is constant and good. If you let it be.
I have been on the daughter side of an alcoholic, and I am now on the girlfriend side of an alcoholic. I prey ever day that He will see the destruction he has not only caused himself but every one that actually cares for him, that will be here for him in the end!

]]> By: Lost Wife http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/comment-page-1/#comment-11752 Lost Wife Wed, 19 Aug 2009 19:51:32 +0000 http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/#comment-11752 Please help me.. My husband drinks all the time, holds down a very important job does not admit to having a drinking problem. He cannot just drink one beer and for the last 6 months has drank everynight, gotten drunk everynight and is no living on his own without me his wife and two amazing teenage children. He also had an affair and this is so out of character for my "real" husband. He was amazing the best father and husband a girl could ever dream of. Now, he blames me for everything, his son for everything and now the girl he had an affair with. He told me I was right about her, how could she do that to a family. How could HE do this to his family? I know I cannot fix him, but I'm so sad all the time that he is living this life. I love him more than he seems to love himself.. He is a wonderful man with a huge problem. What is it going to take for him to hit rock bottom and admit that he needs help? Please any advise..he is leaving his amazing beautiful family that loves him SO much. Please help me.. My husband drinks all the time, holds down a very important job does not admit to having a drinking problem. He cannot just drink one beer and for the last 6 months has drank everynight, gotten drunk everynight and is no living on his own without me his wife and two amazing teenage children. He also had an affair and this is so out of character for my “real” husband. He was amazing the best father and husband a girl could ever dream of. Now, he blames me for everything, his son for everything and now the girl he had an affair with. He told me I was right about her, how could she do that to a family. How could HE do this to his family? I know I cannot fix him, but I’m so sad all the time that he is living this life. I love him more than he seems to love himself.. He is a wonderful man with a huge problem. What is it going to take for him to hit rock bottom and admit that he needs help? Please any advise..he is leaving his amazing beautiful family that loves him SO much.

]]> By: Chris http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/comment-page-1/#comment-11320 Chris Wed, 05 Aug 2009 00:28:23 +0000 http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/#comment-11320 This post seems to have struck a nerve! Thanks for this and all of your posts. Very insightful. I'll inhale them all ASAP. My observation is that: Your advice is the quintessence of true. It is also roughly, in my estimation, kinda useless. But I want to reiterate that I appreciate and enjoy your insights. And your commitment to truth. I've noticed a lot of self-help and let-me-help-you (veteran's) lit is predicated on observations like: Your actions speak louder than your words, and you have to commit to health. I mean the seven habits of successful people type of observation. If these observations were enough to save people on the skids, then just handing them a stack of books and a week off should be enough. I noticed along the way back from my own nadir, which still looms large enough, that these kinds of truths don't work. making change requires facing a bear that's a different bear for everybody. The bear might be a woman or a police officer or the "man in the mirror" or your own mother. In any case it is in the mouth of the cave and there is nothing behind. No escape. I will wobble out onto a limb here and say that for me facing the bear is the challenge. Knowing who it is and what it is and standing face to face with it is the answer. That requires help. That requires therapy and safety, and someone to ask you that lovely question: "how's that workin out for ya?" every day until you realize, of course, inevitably, that the bear somehow is behind you and fresh air is in front. Just to be clear: The bear is not in a can. Beer or whatever it is is just a way of staying in the cave. "self-medication". I appreciate any feedback, and I assure you that I intend this in the spirit of quest for truth, not nerdy superiority! ta-ta. This post seems to have struck a nerve!
Thanks for this and all of your posts.
Very insightful.
I’ll inhale them all ASAP.
My observation is that:
Your advice is the quintessence of true. It is also roughly, in my estimation, kinda useless. But I want to reiterate that I appreciate and enjoy your insights. And your commitment to truth.
I’ve noticed a lot of self-help and let-me-help-you (veteran’s) lit is predicated on observations like:
Your actions speak louder than your words, and you have to commit to health. I mean the seven habits of successful people type of observation.
If these observations were enough to save people on the skids, then just handing them a stack of books and a week off should be enough.
I noticed along the way back from my own nadir, which still looms large enough, that these kinds of truths don’t work.
making change requires facing a bear that’s a different bear for everybody. The bear might be a woman or a police officer or the “man in the mirror” or your own mother. In any case it is in the mouth of the cave and there is nothing behind. No escape.
I will wobble out onto a limb here and say that for me facing the bear is the challenge. Knowing who it is and what it is and standing face to face with it is the answer. That requires help. That requires therapy and safety, and someone to ask you that lovely question:
“how’s that workin out for ya?” every day until you realize, of course, inevitably, that the bear somehow is behind you and fresh air is in front.
Just to be clear: The bear is not in a can. Beer or whatever it is is just a way of staying in the cave. “self-medication”.
I appreciate any feedback, and I assure you that I intend this in the spirit of quest for truth, not nerdy superiority!
ta-ta.

]]> By: RCS http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/comment-page-1/#comment-10555 RCS Tue, 14 Jul 2009 02:49:36 +0000 http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/#comment-10555 Im trying, I just found this site and reading this may help a little. Im fighting 25yrs, it's gonna be tough. I hope I want to more than I have to. Well see.. Im trying, I just found this site and reading this may help a little. Im fighting 25yrs, it’s gonna be tough. I hope I want to more than I have to. Well see..

]]> By: gtg http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/comment-page-1/#comment-10473 gtg Sat, 11 Jul 2009 22:33:17 +0000 http://30sleeps.com/blog/2008/01/27/hitting-rock-bottom/#comment-10473 I have been blessed, only to continually screw it up time and time again. There is an enemy that the world ignores. It is Satan. He drags us to the pit of despair and we follow and choose the easy path. I have been to teen challenge, aa, read rational recovery, and have been the genetic product of alcoholic parents. Life is hard when you choose to self destruct by falling into the same pit of despair and hopelessness, time and time again. GOD bless us all who believe yet cannot comitt to the deception the of the world's blinders. I have been blessed, only to continually screw it up time and time again. There is an enemy that the world ignores. It is Satan. He drags us to the pit of despair and we follow and choose the easy path.
I have been to teen challenge, aa, read rational recovery, and have been the genetic product of alcoholic parents. Life is hard when you choose to self destruct by falling into the same pit of despair and hopelessness, time and time again.
GOD bless us all who believe yet cannot comitt to the deception the of the world’s blinders.

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